Mother’s Day was hard.
My wife and I saw my mom in New Jersey this past Mother’s Day and we knew it was going to be tough. Mom went into memory care in mid-2021. My siblings and I take turns seeing Mom, so when Mother’s Day rolled around, I jumped at my turn to see her. We knew it was going to be heartbreaking, though, and we prepared ourselves. Over the last few years, Mom’s memory has really been fading. We walked into her room, she was happy to have visitors, but you could tell right from the start that she was trying to put names to faces. The names never came. The memories weren’t there.
“You look like one of the kids in the neighborhood,” she said while pointing at me. “You look like someone….”
When I pointed to pictures on her dresser, she said, “Those people look so fancy and they’re always looking at me…” They’re her wedding photos.
Mom doesn’t know who I am. Or my daughter. Or my wife. Dementia has stolen my mom.
We left a few hours later with tears streaming down our cheeks, but when we got back to the hotel that night, Heidi noticed something on one of the pictures hanging on the wall.
“Is that? Wait. Did you bring this?” Heidi asked.
“HA! No. That’s a little God wink, Heidi. He’s always with us.”
There was a little Jesus figurine placed on one of the hotel room pictures. Mother’s Day was sad, but a little Jesus dried our tears.
He’s always with us.
"Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you…" -Isaiah 41:10
If you’re also walking this journey of dementia with someone in your life, just you’re not alone.